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Nytol may cause drowsiness.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward.
Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only.
Close cover before striking.
Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of at least 99.9999999999% empty space.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of the National Foosball League.
Cat napping.
All models over 18 years of age.
Attention.
For office use only.
This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe, including the products of other manufacturers, with a force proportional to the product of the masses and inversely proportional to the distance between them.
This product contains minute electrically charged particles moving at velocities in excess of five hundred million miles per hour.
For recreational use only.
Any use of this product, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe; although no liability is implied herein, the consumer is warned that this process will ultimately lead to the heat death of the Universe.
In case of irritation, flush eyes with cold water and consult your physician.
No resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended.
Original proof of purchase must be returned when applying for a refund.
Replace with same type.
Thanks to the Tech Model Railroad Club.
Prerecorded for this time zone.
New Grand Unified Theory Disclaimer: The manufacturer may technically be entitled to claim that this product is ten dimensional. However, the consumer is reminded that this confers no legal rights above and beyond those applicable to three-dimensional objects, since the seven new dimensions are "rolled up" into such a small "area" that they cannot be detected.
Your mileage may vary.
Check here if tax deductible.
Proof of purchase required.
Rates higher for users under age 25.
Do not dispose of in fire.
Slippery when wet.
Helium balloons may explode when elevated to extreme heights.
Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
Keep cool; process promptly.
Remove baby before folding stroller.
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No purchase necessary.
Not available in stores, call now, operators are standing by.
Driver carries less than $20 worth of ammunition.
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Times are approximate.
Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.
Violators will be towed at owner's expense. See owner for reimbursement form.
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Details inside.
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Product will be hot after heating.
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What goes up, must come down.
No passes accepted for this engagement.
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Misuse may cause personal injury or death.
No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.
No trees were killed in the creation of this message. However, many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
Availability is limited.
Component Equivalency Notice: The subatomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect as those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.
Public Notice as required by law.
Thanks to the US Naval Observatory.
No anchovies unless otherwise specified.
No other warranty expressed or implied.
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Consult your physician before using this program.
The mass of this product contains the energy equivalent of 85 million tons of TNT per net ounce of weight.
Falling rock.
Penalty for private use.
Important Notice to Purchasers.
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Prices subject to change without notice.
Use with adequate ventilation.
Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
Sales tax not included.
The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a "gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power can therefore not be permanently guaranteed.
This is not an offer to sell securities.
Protected by Smith and Wesson.
A 24-hour advance reservation is required.
Add toner.
Use only as directed.
Price does not include taxes.
Simulated picture.
Unpredictable results will occur if allowed to pass beyond the event horizon.
Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.
Call toll free number before digging.
If condition persists, consult your physician.
Not suitable for use at relativistic speeds.
Not to be used for the other use.
Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery.
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Not a safe alternative to smoking cigarettes.
Place stamp here.
Subject to change without notice.
Thanks to the San Antonio Astronomical Association.
Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," it is impossible for the consumer to find out at the same time both precisely where this product is and how fast it is moving.
May cause drowsiness.
Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the consumer is not directly observing this product, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
The buyer assumes all risks associated with using this product.
Caution.
Optional CDW at $14.99 a day or less is available in the U.S.
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Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
Restaurant package, not for resale.
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May cause excitability.
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Handle With Extreme Care.
Not recommended for people over the age of 143.
Unless the word inspletularity has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored.
This product is meant for educational purposes only.
Avoid repeated or prolonged contact with skin.
Employees and their families are not eligible.
Not available in all states.
For use only in the intended use.
Never forget 4/20.
Optional CDW at $23.00 a day or less (shown for guidance only due to fluctuating exchange rates; accurate as of 03/02/01) is available in Europe.
Video cameras in use.
Subject to CAB approval.
Subject to availability.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Kilroy was here.
Not to be removed under penalty of law.
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Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant or are nursing are advised to consult their husband and physician before reading this website.
Warranty period limited.
First pull up, then pull down.
Avoid alcoholic beverages while using this software.
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Void where prohibited.
The above limitations may not apply to you.
Consumer Notice.
Postage will be paid by addressee.
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Hearing protection may be required.
As seen on TV.
At participating locations only.
Read this before opening package.
Not to be used in nuclear reactor control systems.
Use only pencil or blue or black ball point pen.
No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop.
Read all instructions before starting assembly.
Do not disturb.
You could be a winner!
Use at your own risk.
Parental guidance suggested.
Not responsible for user stupidity.
This conversation may be recorded for training or quality purposes, or just because we feel like we can get away with it.
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Special usage rates are also available at select locations.
Useful results can only be obtained in an inertial frame of reference.
May be too intense for some viewers.
Do not remove label under penalty of law.
This Web site is intended for the use of the individual members and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs.
List at least two alternate dates.
No user-serviceable parts inside.
We have sent the forms which seem right for you.
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Many suitcases look alike.
Some assembly required.
Approved for veterans.
Avoid contact with skin.
Drop in any mailbox.
Keep away from fire or flame.
Contains substances known by the State of California to cause cancer or birth defects.
For off-road use only.
Always wear safety goggles.
Sanitized for your protection.
Do not iron clothes on body.
Not responsible for acts of God.
Harmful if swallowed.
May cause allergic skin reaction.
Not recommended for children.
Do not use hair dryer while sleeping.
According to certain suggested versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the primary particles constituting this product may decay to nothingness within the next four hundred million years.
Batteries not included.
Colors may, in time, fade.
No alcohol, dogs or horses.
Must be over 17.
If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
Do not attempt to stop chainsaw chain with your hands.
If symptoms persist, consult your physician.
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Not affiliated with the American Red Cross.
Do not drive car or operate machinery immediately after using Boots Children's Cough Medicine.
Disabling security features will increase the chance of data theft or corruption.
Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
Contents may settle during shipment.
No animals were harmed during the creation of this Web site.
Use inconsistent with package labeling may be a violation of Federal law.
Eating before reading may result in unhealthy indigestion.
Not the Beatles.
Do not fold, spindle or mutilate.
Safe for children and pets.
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Package sold by weight, not volume.
Shading within a garment may occur.
For external use only.
Some restrictions apply.
Call toll free before digging.
Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
At some off-airport locations, an airport-imposed tax or fee, ranging up to 10% will apply if you choose to exit on our shuttle bus.
Shipping and handling extra.
The entire physical universe, including this product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that universe cannot be guaranteed.
Booths for two or more.
Some information may be stored in systems not in your country.
This product warps space and time in its vicinity.
One size fits all.
Advisory.
For indoor or outdoor use only.
Shower cap fits one head.
No COD's.
Warning.
Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop.
Contents under pressure; do not puncture or incinerate.
This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or any other mammal, those who have a penchant for time wasting, illiterates and lawyers.
See label for sequence.
For weekend rate, page must be accessed after noon Thursday and returned by noon Monday or higher daily rates apply.
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Repeating unconfirmed rumors may have adverse consequences.
Not for use with aluminum utensils or cookware.
Store it in a cool, dry place.
There is an extremely small but nonzero chance that, through a process know as "tunneling," this product may spontaneously disappear from its present location and reappear at any random place in the universe, including your neighbor's domicile. The manufacturer will not be responsible for any damages or inconvenience that may result.
Use other side for additional listings.
Edited for television.
Decision of judges is final.
Please Note.
Management assumes no liability for unattended items.
This is a 100% matter product: In the unlikely event that this merchandise should contact antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion will result.
Screens must remain in place to ensure bug free operation.
This notice supersedes all previous notices.
This abridged version does not contain all of the information present in the full text.
Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
Remember to not forget.
Weekly rates require a 5-day minimum rental or daily rates apply.
Subject to local regulation.
List was current at time of printing.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse: Omniscience is mandatory in all cases before the court.
Store in original containers.
Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform.
You must be present to win.
Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
Not safe for children and pets.
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