|
Keep away from small children.
Postage will be paid by addressee.
Keep cool; process promptly.
Full license agreement is included within.
Do not remove label under penalty of law.
Store in original containers.
Thanks to the San Antonio Astronomical Association.
Remember to not forget.
Warranty period limited.
Advisory.
Optional CDW at $23.00 a day or less (shown for guidance only due to fluctuating exchange rates; accurate as of 03/02/01) is available in Europe.
If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
Use with adequate ventilation.
No solicitors.
The entire physical universe, including this product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that universe cannot be guaranteed.
If symptoms persist, consult your physician.
At some off-airport locations, an airport-imposed tax or fee, ranging up to 10% will apply if you choose to exit on our shuttle bus.
Not a safe alternative to smoking cigarettes.
This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or any other mammal, those who have a penchant for time wasting, illiterates and lawyers.
Use only as directed.
Unpredictable results will occur if allowed to pass beyond the event horizon.
This product warps space and time in its vicinity.
No purchase necessary.
Proof of purchase required.
Reproduction strictly prohibited.
No other warranty expressed or implied.
Eating before reading may result in unhealthy indigestion.
Store it in a cool, dry place.
Kilroy was here.
Use at your own risk.
This notice supersedes all previous notices.
Screens must remain in place to ensure bug free operation.
Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform.
Edited for television.
Attention.
Sign here without admitting guilt.
Avoid alcoholic beverages while using this software.
This abridged version does not contain all of the information present in the full text.
New Grand Unified Theory Disclaimer: The manufacturer may technically be entitled to claim that this product is ten dimensional. However, the consumer is reminded that this confers no legal rights above and beyond those applicable to three-dimensional objects, since the seven new dimensions are "rolled up" into such a small "area" that they cannot be detected.
Always wear safety goggles.
This is not an offer to sell securities.
Availability is limited.
In case of irritation, flush eyes with cold water and consult your physician.
Subject to local regulation.
Not recommended for children.
Do not drive car or operate machinery immediately after using Boots Children's Cough Medicine.
Decision of judges is final.
Not to be used in nuclear reactor control systems.
Read this before opening package.
Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," it is impossible for the consumer to find out at the same time both precisely where this product is and how fast it is moving.
Not available in all states.
Place stamp here.
Weekly rates require a 5-day minimum rental or daily rates apply.
Your mileage may vary.
For external use only.
Rates higher for users under age 25.
No Canadian coins.
Not responsible for typographical errors.
No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.
The buyer assumes all risks associated with using this product.
No alcohol, dogs or horses.
Keep this and all software out of the reach of children.
Original proof of purchase must be returned when applying for a refund.
All models over 18 years of age.
Proof of airline or Amtrak arrival is required at ISP counter or higher rates apply.
Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
Some equipment shown is optional.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward.
Not available in stores, call now, operators are standing by.
Do not iron clothes on body.
Shading within a garment may occur.
List at least two alternate dates.
Failure to respond in a timely manner may result in imposition of additional penalties.
Call toll free number before digging.
Do not use hair dryer while sleeping.
Subject to change without notice.
For recreational use only.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery.
According to certain suggested versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the primary particles constituting this product may decay to nothingness within the next four hundred million years.
No resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended.
Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T.
Post office will not deliver without postage.
Misuse may cause personal injury or death.
Times are approximate.
Useful results can only be obtained in an inertial frame of reference.
Component Equivalency Notice: The subatomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect as those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.
Important Notice to Purchasers.
No anchovies unless otherwise specified.
Please Note.
Do not use hair dryer in the shower.
Use other side for additional listings.
Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
Thanks to the Tech Model Railroad Club.
Void where prohibited.
Read all instructions before starting assembly.
No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop.
Sales tax not included.
Keep away from fire or flame.
Apply only to affected area.
What goes up, must come down.
Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.
May be too intense for some viewers.
Do not write below this line.
Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.
Public Notice as required by law.
Beware of dog.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of Major League Foosball.
Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.
No COD's.
Not to be used for the other use.
Not to be removed under penalty of law.
If condition persists, consult your physician.
Do not attempt to stop chainsaw chain with your hands.
Any use of this product, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe; although no liability is implied herein, the consumer is warned that this process will ultimately lead to the heat death of the Universe.
First pull up, then pull down.
Close cover before striking.
Contents under pressure; do not puncture or incinerate.
Read the entire test before answering any questions.
Optional CDW at $14.99 a day or less is available in the U.S.
Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only.
This product contains minute electrically charged particles moving at velocities in excess of five hundred million miles per hour.
Not insured by the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation.
Some restrictions apply.
Shipping and handling extra.
Never forget 4/20.
No animals were harmed during the creation of this Web site.
Do not fold, spindle or mutilate.
Do not carry loose batteries in pockets, purses or bags.
This is a 100% matter product: In the unlikely event that this merchandise should contact antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion will result.
Driver does not carry cash.
Contents may settle during shipment.
Approved for veterans.
Repeating unconfirmed rumors may have adverse consequences.
Many suitcases look alike.
For off-road use only.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse: Omniscience is mandatory in all cases before the court.
Not recommended for people over the age of 143.
The above limitations may not apply to you.
May cause excitability.
Warning.
List each check separately by bank number.
A 24-hour advance reservation is required.
Handle With Extreme Care.
Prerecorded for this time zone.
At participating locations only.
Price does not include taxes.
Simulated picture.
Details inside.
Employees and their families are not eligible.
For weekend rate, page must be accessed after noon Thursday and returned by noon Monday or higher daily rates apply.
Violators will be towed at owner's expense. See owner for reimbursement form.
Consumer Notice.
Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe, including the products of other manufacturers, with a force proportional to the product of the masses and inversely proportional to the distance between them.
Falling rock.
Do not disturb.
Cat napping.
Not for use with aluminum utensils or cookware.
Booths for two or more.
Insure all protective guards are in place before operating machinery.
Protected by Smith and Wesson.
Check here if tax deductible.
As seen on TV.
Batteries not included.
Must be over 17.
May cause allergic skin reaction.
Package sold by weight, not volume.
Drop in any mailbox.
The mass of this product contains the energy equivalent of 85 million tons of TNT per net ounce of weight.
Not the Beatles.
Record additional transactions on back of previous stub.
Thanks to the US Naval Observatory.
The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a "gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power can therefore not be permanently guaranteed.
Do not stamp.
This conversation may be recorded for training or quality purposes, or just because we feel like we can get away with it.
No trees were killed in the creation of this message. However, many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
We have sent the forms which seem right for you.
Add toner.
Restaurant package, not for resale.
For indoor or outdoor use only.
Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant or are nursing are advised to consult their husband and physician before reading this website.
Subject to CAB approval.
Be sure each item is properly endorsed.
Safe for children and pets.
Sanitized for your protection.
Hearing protection may be required.
Unless the word inspletularity has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored.
Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the consumer is not directly observing this product, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
Some assembly required.
You must be present to win.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
Management assumes no liability for unattended items.
Caution.
Disabling security features will increase the chance of data theft or corruption.
Not affiliated with the American Red Cross.
Not responsible for user stupidity.
Nytol may cause drowsiness.
Video cameras in use.
Read label before using.
Helium balloons may explode when elevated to extreme heights.
No user-serviceable parts inside.
Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
Contains substances known by the State of California to cause cancer or birth defects.
For use only in the intended use.
Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
You could be a winner!
Replace with same type.
Not responsible for acts of God.
Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Remove baby before folding stroller.
Use inconsistent with package labeling may be a violation of Federal law.
Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of at least 99.9999999999% empty space.
See label for sequence.
Penalty for private use.
Taxes, airport service charges in Europe, fuel, additional mailbox fee, drop charges and other optional items are extra.
Avoid contact with skin.
Not suitable for use at relativistic speeds.
Prices subject to change without notice.
Some information may be stored in systems not in your country.
May cause drowsiness.
Special usage rates are also available at select locations.
Consult your physician before using this program.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of the National Foosball League.
This Web site is intended for the use of the individual members and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs.
One size fits all.
Avoid repeated or prolonged contact with skin.
Keep marks inside boxes. Be sure you have marked correctly.
Not safe for children and pets.
Product will be hot after heating.
Subject to availability.
Use only pencil or blue or black ball point pen.
Use only in a well-ventilated area.
There is an extremely small but nonzero chance that, through a process know as "tunneling," this product may spontaneously disappear from its present location and reappear at any random place in the universe, including your neighbor's domicile. The manufacturer will not be responsible for any damages or inconvenience that may result.
Do not fold, bend, staple or mutilate.
Harmful if swallowed.
Slippery when wet.
Shower cap fits one head.
Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop.
Parental guidance suggested.
Colors may, in time, fade.
For office use only.
No passes accepted for this engagement.
Do not insert backwards.
Call toll free before digging.
Driver carries less than $20 worth of ammunition.
Do not dispose of in fire.
Health Warning: Care should be taken when lifting this product, since its mass, and thus its weight, is dependent on its velocity relative to the user.
This product is meant for educational purposes only.
List was current at time of printing.
Bonded items should not be placed in oven, microwave or dishwasher.
|
|
