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This abridged version does not contain all of the information present in the full text.
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This product is meant for educational purposes only.
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Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
May cause drowsiness.
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Screens must remain in place to ensure bug free operation.
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This conversation may be recorded for training or quality purposes, or just because we feel like we can get away with it.
New Grand Unified Theory Disclaimer: The manufacturer may technically be entitled to claim that this product is ten dimensional. However, the consumer is reminded that this confers no legal rights above and beyond those applicable to three-dimensional objects, since the seven new dimensions are "rolled up" into such a small "area" that they cannot be detected.
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Remove baby before folding stroller.
Do not fold, bend, staple or mutilate.
Thanks to the San Antonio Astronomical Association.
Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
Never forget 4/20.
Safe for children and pets.
No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop.
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Beware of dog.
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We have sent the forms which seem right for you.
Prices subject to change without notice.
Shower cap fits one head.
No anchovies unless otherwise specified.
Keep away from small children.
Insure all protective guards are in place before operating machinery.
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What goes up, must come down.
Thanks to the Tech Model Railroad Club.
Simulated picture.
Not available in all states.
Not responsible for typographical errors.
For use only in the intended use.
In case of irritation, flush eyes with cold water and consult your physician.
Add toner.
Component Equivalency Notice: The subatomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect as those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.
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Harmful if swallowed.
No trees were killed in the creation of this message. However, many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
Helium balloons may explode when elevated to extreme heights.
Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
Do not use hair dryer in the shower.
This product warps space and time in its vicinity.
Employees and their families are not eligible.
Driver does not carry cash.
Useful results can only be obtained in an inertial frame of reference.
Optional CDW at $14.99 a day or less is available in the U.S.
Some information may be stored in systems not in your country.
You could be a winner!
Many suitcases look alike.
Sanitized for your protection.
Please Note.
Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of at least 99.9999999999% empty space.
Do not dispose of in fire.
All models over 18 years of age.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of the National Foosball League.
Edited for television.
Your mileage may vary.
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Any use of this product, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe; although no liability is implied herein, the consumer is warned that this process will ultimately lead to the heat death of the Universe.
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Rates higher for users under age 25.
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Booths for two or more.
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Use at your own risk.
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Some restrictions apply.
No other warranty expressed or implied.
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Keep away from fire or flame.
Colors may, in time, fade.
Drop in any mailbox.
List at least two alternate dates.
Repeating unconfirmed rumors may have adverse consequences.
Not suitable for use at relativistic speeds.
Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery.
Call toll free number before digging.
Parental guidance suggested.
Use only pencil or blue or black ball point pen.
Availability is limited.
Use with adequate ventilation.
The buyer assumes all risks associated with using this product.
According to certain suggested versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the primary particles constituting this product may decay to nothingness within the next four hundred million years.
List each check separately by bank number.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Read all instructions before starting assembly.
Do not remove label under penalty of law.
Not affiliated with the American Red Cross.
Reproduction strictly prohibited.
This is a 100% matter product: In the unlikely event that this merchandise should contact antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion will result.
Thanks to the US Naval Observatory.
One size fits all.
Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the consumer is not directly observing this product, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
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Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
Contents may settle during shipment.
Do not drive car or operate machinery immediately after using Boots Children's Cough Medicine.
The entire physical universe, including this product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that universe cannot be guaranteed.
Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform.
Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
Check here if tax deductible.
You must be present to win.
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Keep cool; process promptly.
Contents under pressure; do not puncture or incinerate.
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Details inside.
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Penalty for private use.
The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a "gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power can therefore not be permanently guaranteed.
Caution.
Slippery when wet.
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Warranty period limited.
Handle With Extreme Care.
Misuse may cause personal injury or death.
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For recreational use only.
Not a safe alternative to smoking cigarettes.
Special usage rates are also available at select locations.
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Read this before opening package.
Attention.
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Unpredictable results will occur if allowed to pass beyond the event horizon.
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Driver carries less than $20 worth of ammunition.
Consumer Notice.
Use only in a well-ventilated area.
This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe, including the products of other manufacturers, with a force proportional to the product of the masses and inversely proportional to the distance between them.
Advisory.
Subject to local regulation.
Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
Postage will be paid by addressee.
Package sold by weight, not volume.
Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Store it in a cool, dry place.
Do not attempt to stop chainsaw chain with your hands.
Kilroy was here.
May cause allergic skin reaction.
As seen on TV.
No user-serviceable parts inside.
Do not iron clothes on body.
Contains substances known by the State of California to cause cancer or birth defects.
No resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended.
Not recommended for children.
Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop.
Price does not include taxes.
The mass of this product contains the energy equivalent of 85 million tons of TNT per net ounce of weight.
Close cover before striking.
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Nytol may cause drowsiness.
Store in original containers.
May be too intense for some viewers.
Public Notice as required by law.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward.
See label for sequence.
Use inconsistent with package labeling may be a violation of Federal law.
Subject to availability.
Not the Beatles.
Shipping and handling extra.
There is an extremely small but nonzero chance that, through a process know as "tunneling," this product may spontaneously disappear from its present location and reappear at any random place in the universe, including your neighbor's domicile. The manufacturer will not be responsible for any damages or inconvenience that may result.
Management assumes no liability for unattended items.
Some assembly required.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse: Omniscience is mandatory in all cases before the court.
Call toll free before digging.
Shading within a garment may occur.
Do not use hair dryer while sleeping.
Do not stamp.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
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First pull up, then pull down.
Proof of airline or Amtrak arrival is required at ISP counter or higher rates apply.
Use only as directed.
If symptoms persist, consult your physician.
Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.
List was current at time of printing.
Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant or are nursing are advised to consult their husband and physician before reading this website.
Remember to not forget.
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Batteries not included.
Cat napping.
This product contains minute electrically charged particles moving at velocities in excess of five hundred million miles per hour.
This notice supersedes all previous notices.
No alcohol, dogs or horses.
May cause excitability.
No purchase necessary.
Eating before reading may result in unhealthy indigestion.
Health Warning: Care should be taken when lifting this product, since its mass, and thus its weight, is dependent on its velocity relative to the user.
For office use only.
Violators will be towed at owner's expense. See owner for reimbursement form.
Avoid alcoholic beverages while using this software.
Falling rock.
No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.
Warning.
Not responsible for acts of God.
Must be over 17.
Replace with same type.
The above limitations may not apply to you.
Not insured by the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation.
Decision of judges is final.
A 24-hour advance reservation is required.
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